I think I've made up my mind.

Well, it looks like we're taking the homeschooling plunge. While many of my friends are filling out Kindergarten applications, I've been hemming and hawing and trying to decide what's best for us. The answer that has come to me after many hours of praying and pondering? A resounding "I don't know."

This hasn't been an easy decision for me because public school certainly has its merits. It's free (or rather, it's something we're already paying for anyway with our taxes). It provides opportunities for socialization that I can't quite replicate with homeschooling. It ensures that he'll be learning at an appropriate pace for his age and grade level, and he'll have the pressure of his peers and teachers to keep him on track. Having both kids in school would mean I could return to full-time work eventually. And possibly the best of all--public schooling requires very little effort on my part. 

I know a lot of people, particularly Christian families, who choose to homeschool to protect their kids from negative influences. I understand why they do that, and I even agree with it to some degree, but I have to admit that this is not a major influence in my decision to homeschool. In fact, I even wonder if this could be a negative. I want my children to love and have compassion for non-believers and not feel suspicious of them or develop an "us-vs-them" mentality. I need to teach them to positively interact with people who don't believe the same things that they believe and to engage with them in honest discussions without compromising their faith and values. So how am I going to do this when they're stuck at home with me every day? Maybe it means they eventually will go to public school, or maybe it means we get creative by doing some outreach programs as part of our homeschooling. I have lots of questions like this that I haven't quite resolved yet.

So with all my misgivings and concerns, what tipped the scales in favor of homeschooling? I think the number one reason is the gift of time. Everyone says children grow up so fast. If I homeschool, I'll get to spend 2-3 times more quality time with my children than those who don't. (I know, I know... lots of people reading this would reply, "And that's a good thing??" But I really do enjoy spending time with my children. And I know you do too, cynical one.)

Another reason is that I've had 5 years now to get to know Perrin's personality and how he learns best, and I've concluded that traditional schooling would not be a good fit for him. He loves learning right now, and I don't want to take that away from him by putting him in a situation that simply doesn't fit his style and strengths. Homeschooling means we can read a book together at the park, or examine bugs under our microscope, or learn about trains from youtube videos, or take field trips to the museum. And he can chew gum or wiggle to his heart's content or ask me a zillion questions while we're doing school work, and I won't mind. And who better to choose his curriculum and teach it to him than the person who knows him best and cares more about his education than anyone?

So I think I've made up my mind. And if you've read this entire blog post of my ramblings, wow! I don't know if you're really interested in my schooling choice for my kids or just incredibly bored (because there are some seriously entertaining things on the Internet you could be looking at right now instead), but whatever the case, thank you for caring... and please pray for my sanity and patience for the next 18 years. Our incredible, entertaining, frustrating, overwhelming journey of homeschooling is about to begin.