When I was pregnant, a lot of people told me what it would be like to have a baby. They said it would be hard; they said it would be fun. They'd said I'd be sleep deprived, that I'd change more diapers than I could imagine, and that it would all be so worth it. One thing nobody told me was how absolutely terrifying it is to be a parent. You have this tiny, helpless person who is so dependent on you that you worry constantly for his safety. Then when something bad actually does happen, even if it's minor, it's really scary!
Example: Last night, Perrin got stung by a wasp. Trey and I absolutely freaked out. We felt like the worst parents ever that we would allow our little 5-week-old baby to get stung by a wasp. And we were truly worried for him. He screamed like a banshee while Trey dialed the after-hours number to get in touch with the nurse on call. I guess that number is technically supposed to be for emergencies, and while a wasp sting is not really a big deal in the grand scheme of things, we really just felt like we needed some assurance that it didn't mean instant death.
The nurse assured us that from our description, it didn't sound as if he was having an allergic reaction. And we managed to get him calmed down within about 20 minutes. Wonder of wonders, he even fell asleep soon afterwards.
When I think about the next 18 years and how many times I'm going to freak out about Perrin's well-being, I get really tired. I was totally flipping out, even though a wasp sting isn't really a big deal. Even so, if you see a wasp today, smash him for me. Smash him hard.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Friday, March 26, 2010
Where's the mute button?!
Our sweet baby has given us quite a challenging week. For one thing, I think he might be going through a growth spurt, because he suddenly wants to nurse constantly. Pretty much every hour when he's awake. It's exhausting! (I'm actually typing this one-handed as I feed him. Impressed with my multi-tasking abilities? I am.) For another thing, he's been awake a lot more this week, and when he hasn't been nursing, he's been crying. I can usually get him to settle down for a while, but as soon as I put him down, he starts up again. Trey and I have tried all kinds of tactics to keep from losing our sanity:
1. Bribery. "Perrin, what do you want? I'll give you anything you want. Do you want a pony? I'll buy you a pony if you'll just stop crying and go to sleep!" (I really did say this to Perrin, but he didn't keep up his end of the bargain on that particular night, so no pony).
2. Humor. Sometimes I really just have to try not to take the situation too seriously, or I'll want to pull my hair out. I'll say something like, "Perrin, I'm going to put you to bed now, and I don't want your evil twin taking over and waking me up in an hour. Okay? Okay." (Of course, it's not so funny when the "evil twin" really does wake up screaming an hour later.)
3. Prayer: Along the lines of "Dear Lord, HEEEEEEEEELP!"
4. Going down "the list": Feed him. Change him. Burp him. Swaddle him. Carry him. Jiggle him. Sing to him. Rock him. By the end of the night, he may not be ready for bed, but we sure are!
Good thing he's so cute... it's impossible to stay irritated with him for long.
1. Bribery. "Perrin, what do you want? I'll give you anything you want. Do you want a pony? I'll buy you a pony if you'll just stop crying and go to sleep!" (I really did say this to Perrin, but he didn't keep up his end of the bargain on that particular night, so no pony).
2. Humor. Sometimes I really just have to try not to take the situation too seriously, or I'll want to pull my hair out. I'll say something like, "Perrin, I'm going to put you to bed now, and I don't want your evil twin taking over and waking me up in an hour. Okay? Okay." (Of course, it's not so funny when the "evil twin" really does wake up screaming an hour later.)
3. Prayer: Along the lines of "Dear Lord, HEEEEEEEEELP!"
4. Going down "the list": Feed him. Change him. Burp him. Swaddle him. Carry him. Jiggle him. Sing to him. Rock him. By the end of the night, he may not be ready for bed, but we sure are!
Good thing he's so cute... it's impossible to stay irritated with him for long.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Hello, my name is Food
Sometimes I wonder if Perrin has any idea that I'm his mom. Does he distinguish me from all the other people who pick him up and cuddle him? Maybe not. One thing I'm pretty sure about--he does recognize that I'm his source of food. But I hope he thinks of me as more than just food.
Trey doesn't help with this much... sometimes when he gets Perrin out of his crib in the morning, he'll carry him to me and say, "Look, Perrin! There's Breakfast! Let's go say hi to Breakfast!"
It's weird but true. I am breakfast. And lunch and dinner and about 8 other meals in between. To tell the truth, it's quite amazing the way a woman's body is designed to be able to provide the most perfect, nutritious, beneficial meal possible to her baby. But it's also a thankless, time-consuming, and sometimes painful job.
Someday Perrin will recognize me as his mom. Someday he'll love me for more than just the food I provide him. Until then, just call me Breakfast.
Trey doesn't help with this much... sometimes when he gets Perrin out of his crib in the morning, he'll carry him to me and say, "Look, Perrin! There's Breakfast! Let's go say hi to Breakfast!"
It's weird but true. I am breakfast. And lunch and dinner and about 8 other meals in between. To tell the truth, it's quite amazing the way a woman's body is designed to be able to provide the most perfect, nutritious, beneficial meal possible to her baby. But it's also a thankless, time-consuming, and sometimes painful job.
Someday Perrin will recognize me as his mom. Someday he'll love me for more than just the food I provide him. Until then, just call me Breakfast.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
A day with a newborn
I always wondered what exactly it would be like to take care of a baby day in and day out. For all my childless friends out there who wonder the same thing, here's how my day usually goes:
12 AM:Change and feed Perrin and attempt to go back to sleep.
3 AM: Change and feed Perrin and attempt to go back to sleep.
6 AM: Change and feed Perrin and attempt to go back to sleep.
7 AM-9 AM: Perrin usually sleeps pretty well through the morning, so I sleep in too. I've always been a morning person and generally never slept past 7 or 7:30. Those days are gone. If Perrin is sleeping in, I'm sleeping in.
9 AM: Time to get out of bed. Hopefully Perrin is still sleeping, which gives me a little time to take a shower before he wakes up ready to eat again.
9:15 AM: It's inevitable: halfway through the shower, Perrin wakes up crying. I rinse off, jump out of the shower, speed dry, and rush into the nursery. He's in desperate need of a diaper change and acts like he hasn't eaten in ages. Oh, and he's managed to leak through his diaper, so I change his clothes too. And his sheets.
10 AM: Perrin is clean and fed. I'd really like to finish getting dressed, brush my teeth, and grab a quick bite to eat for breakfast... or at least a glass of juice if breakfast is out of the question. Perrin is wide awake and not interested in staying in his crib. I attempt to put him in his swing, but he's been alone all night and is ready to be held and cuddled... and what the boss wants, the boss gets.
10 AM-12 PM: I check a few emails, catch up with friends on Facebook,and read the news online. I mostly do it one-handed so I can hold Perrin. This will be easier once he can hold his head up on his own. I take breaks from the computer to change him and feed him again. If he gets fussy, I'll walk around the house with him. That seems to calm him down.
12:30 PM: He's asleep! Praise the Lord! I may or may not have had time for breakfast, but either way, I'm hungry. I grab a quick bite to eat, and since Perrin is still asleep, I also throw together a load of laundry and run the dishwasher. If he's still asleep after all that, I just might sit down to do something mundane and enjoyable, like reading or updating my blog.
2 PM: Perrin wakes up and needs to be changed and fed again.
3 PM: Tummy time! I place Perrin on a blanket on the floor and let him squirm around on his belly. It's good exercise for him and will help him develop the muscles he needs to crawl. He really looks like he's trying to go somewhere. Maybe he'll be an early crawler.
4 PM: Time to feed and change him again.
4:30 PM: Trey is home! Time for some father-son snuggle time while I sort through the mail and do some light housework. If Trey's lucky, I might consider making something for dinner.
6 PM: We try to coax Perrin to sleep so that we can have a quiet dinner together. No such luck. I end up holding him with one hand (awkwardly) and eating with the other (also awkwardly... and trying my hardest not to drop food particles on Perrin's head). Some days he'll let us put him in his swing while we eat. Strange how much I enjoy just being able to savor my food and talk to Trey during dinner time--something I really took for granted before!
6:30 PM: Time to feed and change him again.
7:30 PM: Bath time! Perrin hates baths, but I love when he smells all clean and fresh. Plus he looks super cute bundled up in his hooded towel.
8:30 PM: We try to get Perrin to go to sleep for the night, but he's crying. We swaddle him, carry him around, feed him again, then let him snuggle in our bed with us while we read for a bit. If we're lucky, he'll get nice and sleepy and we can put him down for the night. If we're not lucky, we might end up carrying him around for quite awhile until he's cried enough to wear himself out. At some point, he does fall asleep.
That's my day in a nutshell. Taking care of a newborn is definitely a full-time job!
12 AM:Change and feed Perrin and attempt to go back to sleep.
3 AM: Change and feed Perrin and attempt to go back to sleep.
6 AM: Change and feed Perrin and attempt to go back to sleep.
7 AM-9 AM: Perrin usually sleeps pretty well through the morning, so I sleep in too. I've always been a morning person and generally never slept past 7 or 7:30. Those days are gone. If Perrin is sleeping in, I'm sleeping in.
9 AM: Time to get out of bed. Hopefully Perrin is still sleeping, which gives me a little time to take a shower before he wakes up ready to eat again.
9:15 AM: It's inevitable: halfway through the shower, Perrin wakes up crying. I rinse off, jump out of the shower, speed dry, and rush into the nursery. He's in desperate need of a diaper change and acts like he hasn't eaten in ages. Oh, and he's managed to leak through his diaper, so I change his clothes too. And his sheets.
10 AM: Perrin is clean and fed. I'd really like to finish getting dressed, brush my teeth, and grab a quick bite to eat for breakfast... or at least a glass of juice if breakfast is out of the question. Perrin is wide awake and not interested in staying in his crib. I attempt to put him in his swing, but he's been alone all night and is ready to be held and cuddled... and what the boss wants, the boss gets.
10 AM-12 PM: I check a few emails, catch up with friends on Facebook,and read the news online. I mostly do it one-handed so I can hold Perrin. This will be easier once he can hold his head up on his own. I take breaks from the computer to change him and feed him again. If he gets fussy, I'll walk around the house with him. That seems to calm him down.
12:30 PM: He's asleep! Praise the Lord! I may or may not have had time for breakfast, but either way, I'm hungry. I grab a quick bite to eat, and since Perrin is still asleep, I also throw together a load of laundry and run the dishwasher. If he's still asleep after all that, I just might sit down to do something mundane and enjoyable, like reading or updating my blog.
2 PM: Perrin wakes up and needs to be changed and fed again.
3 PM: Tummy time! I place Perrin on a blanket on the floor and let him squirm around on his belly. It's good exercise for him and will help him develop the muscles he needs to crawl. He really looks like he's trying to go somewhere. Maybe he'll be an early crawler.
4 PM: Time to feed and change him again.
4:30 PM: Trey is home! Time for some father-son snuggle time while I sort through the mail and do some light housework. If Trey's lucky, I might consider making something for dinner.
6 PM: We try to coax Perrin to sleep so that we can have a quiet dinner together. No such luck. I end up holding him with one hand (awkwardly) and eating with the other (also awkwardly... and trying my hardest not to drop food particles on Perrin's head). Some days he'll let us put him in his swing while we eat. Strange how much I enjoy just being able to savor my food and talk to Trey during dinner time--something I really took for granted before!
6:30 PM: Time to feed and change him again.
7:30 PM: Bath time! Perrin hates baths, but I love when he smells all clean and fresh. Plus he looks super cute bundled up in his hooded towel.
8:30 PM: We try to get Perrin to go to sleep for the night, but he's crying. We swaddle him, carry him around, feed him again, then let him snuggle in our bed with us while we read for a bit. If we're lucky, he'll get nice and sleepy and we can put him down for the night. If we're not lucky, we might end up carrying him around for quite awhile until he's cried enough to wear himself out. At some point, he does fall asleep.
That's my day in a nutshell. Taking care of a newborn is definitely a full-time job!
Monday, March 1, 2010
The unexpected
We've survived a little over a week with a newborn, and we must be doing an okay job as parents--Perrin seems to be a perfectly healthy, happy little baby. And I must say, I'm really enjoying being a mom! It's been a big adjustment though, obviously. And in some ways it's been different from what I expected it to be. Here are just a few examples.
I didn't expect...
1. That Perrin would always wait until we removed his diaper to decide to pee. I'd heard that baby boys would sometimes do this; I just didn't think we'd have to be on constant alert for it. It's a little embarrassing when we take him to the pediatrician for a weight check and he sprays down the entire room (including me and the diaper bag).
2. That I would keep forgetting we have a dog. People say that having a baby will make you love your pets less. But Trey and I talked a lot before Perrin was born about how we would make Molly feel like she's still a part of the family. We vowed we would pay her lots of attention and treat her extra nice while she was getting used to sharing the house with a baby. But I keep waking up in the morning and completely forgetting that there's a dog somewhere that needs to be fed and taken outside occasionally. Poor Molly.
3. That my life would be so consumed with nursing. Babies have to eat about every 2-3 hours.Perrin sometimes eats even more frequently than that, and since it takes a good 30 minutes each time, I feel like I'm feeding him constantly. The boy is going to be an eater...
4. That I would feel worried every time he sleeps for more than a couple hours and wonder if he's okay. Maybe it's just a jittery-new-parent thing, but I sometimes poke him a little until he moves just to make sure he's still alive and breathing. A couple months ago, I probably would have laughed at someone being so paranoid. But I caught Trey doing it today too, so I'm glad it's not just me.
5. That we would be blessed with the cutest, sweetest, most perfect little baby in the whole world! Okay, I might be a teensy bit biased, but seriously--Perrin is pretty special. I was always a little unsure about having kids. But I feel like Perrin is a gift that I never knew I always wanted.
I didn't expect...
1. That Perrin would always wait until we removed his diaper to decide to pee. I'd heard that baby boys would sometimes do this; I just didn't think we'd have to be on constant alert for it. It's a little embarrassing when we take him to the pediatrician for a weight check and he sprays down the entire room (including me and the diaper bag).
2. That I would keep forgetting we have a dog. People say that having a baby will make you love your pets less. But Trey and I talked a lot before Perrin was born about how we would make Molly feel like she's still a part of the family. We vowed we would pay her lots of attention and treat her extra nice while she was getting used to sharing the house with a baby. But I keep waking up in the morning and completely forgetting that there's a dog somewhere that needs to be fed and taken outside occasionally. Poor Molly.
3. That my life would be so consumed with nursing. Babies have to eat about every 2-3 hours.Perrin sometimes eats even more frequently than that, and since it takes a good 30 minutes each time, I feel like I'm feeding him constantly. The boy is going to be an eater...
4. That I would feel worried every time he sleeps for more than a couple hours and wonder if he's okay. Maybe it's just a jittery-new-parent thing, but I sometimes poke him a little until he moves just to make sure he's still alive and breathing. A couple months ago, I probably would have laughed at someone being so paranoid. But I caught Trey doing it today too, so I'm glad it's not just me.
5. That we would be blessed with the cutest, sweetest, most perfect little baby in the whole world! Okay, I might be a teensy bit biased, but seriously--Perrin is pretty special. I was always a little unsure about having kids. But I feel like Perrin is a gift that I never knew I always wanted.
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